Russian stereotypes about Britain and British

  Well, when I read this article in DM last night and looked through all those nasty comments I got really sad about the following: looks like DM is deliberately forming a very "specific" image of Russia in minds of Brits and encourages British people to get more "anti-Russian" myths.

 What does an average British person know about Russia?

  It's cold, there is Putin, everybody drinks vodka, there are bears with balalaikas everywhere, all Russians are drunkards and mafia people.
  That's basically it.
  Does an average British person know that Russia is a country of more than 200 different languages? That it has unbelievable variety of landscapes, cultures, time zones?

  Were the people who commented about "Russia being a primitive country" and "every Russian having a mental illness" keeping in mind great Russian literature, classical ballet, unique architecture? 

  British people have ENOUGH unfortunate  myths and stereotypes about Russia and Russians.

  Every newspaper - especially a big one such as Daily Mail - MUST have some social responsibility.
  Every author in a newspaper has to understand that he or she is responsible for what they write. For what they encourage.

  At the moment I can say that Daily Mail is responsible for this xenophobic wave of hatred towards Russians in comments.

  And the saddest thing is that it only adds to all those nasty "anti-Russian" myths.

  So - what about Russians then? What do average Russians think of Britain and British people?

  It might surprise somebody but Russians actually have quite positive stereotypes of the UK and people living in the country.
 1. Britain is the country of great English classical literature and specifically of Sherlock Holmes.
  There was a very successful and very popular TV-series in Soviet times about Sherlock Holmes.

To the left - Livanov (Sherlock Holmes), to the right - Solomin (Doctor Watson).
  Filmed in the times of Iron Curtain and total deficit this TV series became extremely popular. The whole film crew worked hard to make the film and everything in it look as English as possible - not an easy task in those days.
  It's an adorable movie classics now.
 2. Britain is the country of people with perfect manners.
  Russians may joke about it (here is one old Russian joke: a woman with lots of heavy bags gets on a bus. All seats are taken, mostly by men. She sighs and says to a big bloke sitting on a seat next to her, "Are there any gentlemen on this bus?", looking at him expectantly and hoping he will give her his seat. "There are plenty of gentlemen here!", responds the bloke, "There are no spare seats though!").
 

 So Russians may joke about that but "ladylike" and "gentleman" behaviour is something Russians strongly associate with Britain and British.
  All British people are polite and well-mannered - that's what most Russians think.
3. All British people are into sports, they are athletic sport-loving fit people.
  
This might have come from the general perception that Britain is the "cradle" of sport - especially football.
4. British people are well-educated.
   

  This is of course strongly associated with boarding schools - though most Russians are aware that not every Brit goes to a public school there is still this idea that British people get educated in a very classical way, studying Latin, Ancient Greek and spending most of their youths with heavy books in their hands.

  I could go on with positive stereotypes Russians have about Britain and British: about five o'clock teas, cute old ladies in funny hats, about British people loving their pets dearly, about British people having healthy porridge for breakfast, etc. - but all in all those stereotypes are not bad, they are positive and quite friendly.

  And about this publication and comments in DM: you can have hostile perception of any and every nation. Is it really that good to be alienated? 

"Russians are far from the norm!" and "British people have more class!" Daily Mail

  Daily Mail posted a short article about what somebody named Hayley O'Keeffe called "Russian online dating".
  Here's the link http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2492393/Hilarious-images-singles-looking-love-Russian-dating-site.html.
  The person named H.O'Keeffe doesn't specify which dating website it is, instead uses lots of generalizing phrases like "desperate poses of Russians looking for love", "welcome to the world of Russian online dating".
  The person named H. O'Keeffe didn't bother herself looking up the words in the newspaper on one of the photos - otherwise she would know it's not Russian, it's Ukrainian actually.

  It doesn't matter however. What matters is that this publication "triggered" lots of very xenophobic and bullying comments.

Here are some of them,
"Russians are far from norm"
"Primitive country!"
"I want the Iron Curtain back!"
"Russia has never been the brightest nation!"

"To think we fought along side with this Filth in WW2 makes me vomit!"

"Russians are 30 years behind!"

"Exactly WHICH planet are Russians from?"

and the "best" - in my opinion "I have heard that every Russian has a mental condition due to genetics!"

  Apart from the fact that it is very xenophobic and it is cyber-bullying of an entire nation there are other aspects to that that bother me.

  The main one is the following: why would media want to form an unfortunate image like that of an entire nation? Of a big country with several time zones and nearly 300 different languages?

  Why would DM approve of and encourage xenophobic comments?

  How is it possible that in the country which is proud of fighting against racism one of the biggest and most popular newspapers allows articles like that and comments like that?

  Is being xenophobic any better than being a racist?

  Or, and that's an interesting bit - Are some animals still more equal that others? 

  Does DM really stand for the opinion that some countries (like Russia) are "primitive, 30 years behind, mentally ill" and that is why cyber-bullying of these countries is justified? 

  Because - Britain is much better than Russia so you can bully Russia and Russians as much as you like - they are a nation of a "third rate"?

Being critical

  All those pointless megabytes of "Me and some stuff" photos in social networks!
  All those "who the f**k cares" details of one's own life!
  What a perfect way to create a virtual temple for worshiping yourself.

  For lots of people it IS already a Matrix - you can't encounter as many lies elsewhere but networks.
  

Women of the 50s

  Having seen 'Mona Lisa's Smile' which is on TV tonight several times before I keep thinking about enormous difference between Western and Soviet women in the 1950s.
  The story told in the film is about a college art teacher who challenges 'traditional values' of 1950-s women - marriage and family above all and everything. No career pursuit whatsoever, no job, just home life and housework - that was these middle-class young women's destiny, even though they were getting education good enough to become lawyers or corporate executives.
  One of the most remarkable scenes in this film (in my opinion) is Nancy Abbey's class in - I really don't know what to call this subject they were studying... Domestic Life? Being a Good Wife? Mastering the Art of Running a House? - when girls are supposed to roleplay solving the issue of a dinner party for their potential husband's boss and his colleague rivals.
  Lots and lots have been written on the subject of women's role in society after World War II - it was undoubtedly strongly associated with dinner parties, serving supper at 5 pm sharp, greeting a husband with a smile and a Martini - being home goddesses, whatever this slightly offensive phrase might mean.
  After the war - and this idea is neither fresh nor challenging - the world was striving to see women being as much feminine as possible.

    That's where this luxurious and submissive Dior's New Look came from - this 'highly feminine' fashion of high heels, corset-type dresses, red lipstick and girly curls.
  Women as home elves, fragile but hard working creatures, stunning at dinner parties and restless at housework.
  Women as expensive but totally dependent toys. Men's toys, of course. Men's possessions.
  One of the characters of the greatest 19th century Russian playwright Ostrovsky, Larisa Ogudalova, an outstandingly beautiful and charming young girl from a noble but impoverished family, claims that if she is supposed to be some man's possession the only way is to be an expensive one. Very cynical and tragic line reflecting on what women's destiny was (and is and will be) in a men powered world.
  And those college girls in the film were putting a lot of effort in making themselves very expensive assets for their future husbands - assets as valuable as possible, possessions to be proud of.
  Was it or was it not the only women's choice in 1950s Western world - being a perfect wife and mother - is another matter.
  The fact is women in the Soviet Union in the same decade were as far from this destiny of 'domestic goddesses' as never before.
  Total deficit was the main feature of the era - Soviet women couldn't even dream of luxurious clothes in Dior's New Look style. A pair of new stockings - that was a dream come true. Genuine perfume - a heavenly gift. 'Girly' little luxuries were so rare in those days and any attempts to look pretty were seen as inappropriate fussiness.
  Soviet women of the 50s had neither resources nor time to long for divine femininity of 'home goddesses' because they had to face the most fatal and devastating deficit - the lack of men, millions of which were killed at war.
  Most Soviet households in the 1950s were widowed women's desperate homes filled with despair, tears and struggle to get bread on the table.
  It was Soviet women who were rebuilding the country and the society in the 1950s. It was women who were raising kids, fixing railways and growing crops. Millions of desperate women whose feet were too 'worn out' for New Look high heels. Millions of widows who had their late husbands' photos hidden behind icons - in the last hope they might come back one day.
  They were absolutely free from being just someone's other half at home.
  They didn't have any chance to enjoy this luxury of just being a wife.
  Given this chance, would they choose New Look dresses and dinners at 5? 

"We were very lucky. They hardly ever sold us against our will!"

  Not so many Western people know that serfdom (which is basically slavery) existed in Russia up to 1861 when serfs (most of them peasants) were all freed thanks to Tsar Alexander II reform.

  Just for the sake of comparison: serfdom stopped existing in Britain in the XVth century.

  Slavery was abolished in the USA by 1865.

  So in terms of time there isn't considerable difference between Russia and the USA.

  When it comes to serfs' and slaves' rights I have to say both categories (in America as well as in Russia) were absolutely dependent on their owners' will. Russian serfs couldn't move against their owners' will, couldn't marry whoever they wanted, were seriously abused by their owners', had to rely completely on their owners' good will. 

  They were easily traded and their desire was never taken into account.

  It was a common thing among nobility to sell several serfs - or 'souls' as they were used to be called - for a couple of good hunting dogs (Russian nobility in the XIXth century were passionate hunters).

  My ancestors on my Mother's side were serfs. Slaves. Without any rights whatsoever - they could be sold, whipped to death, robbed or raped by their owners.

  However, our family history says the nobility owning us were quite liberal. As my great-grandmother used to say, "They were kind and merciful and never sold us against our will!"

  Serfdom (slavery) didn't stop people from being talented artists, composers, poets and actors.

  One of the most famous and most romantic love stories is the one of Parasha Kovaleva-Zhemchugova, a serf actress, who secretly got married to her owner, Count Sheremetyev - marriage almost impossible in the early XIXth century. 

  

'First they came for....'

  I have just been pointed out that one very famous quote could be applied to the current situation in Russia.
  It's the one by Martin Niemoeller:

First they came for the communists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a communist.

Then they came for the socialists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a socialist.

Then they came for the trade unionists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a Jew.

Then they came for the Catholics,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a Catholic.

Then they came for me,
and there was no one left to speak for me.

Anybody who is different. Anybody who stands out. 

Notorious Russian blogger's answer to Stephen Fry's letter

I have translated this post for my English-speaking readers.

I have put some of the bits of it in bold just to stress them - they are not in bold in the original.

One can easily see how much twisting with the words and meanings is involved here, how hypocritical these statements are, how eloquent the blogger is to support her ideas.

Dear Mr. President! Dear Vladimir Vladimirovich!

Dear Mr. Rogge, Mr. Alexander Zhukov and all the other Members of the International Olympic Committee!

I am not Stephen Fry, I'm just a modest scriptwriter, a novel writer and a fitness loving girl, so I guess my letter might never reach you. But I'm writing in hope to be heard, while probably not by you, but at least by all the sensible people, who consider the traditional sexual orientation and love for sports to be their solid and unquestionable values.

I hate all forms and kinds of fascism, I hate wars, including the Second World War, which the Nazi Germany started against the whole world thanks to criminal condonation and even instigation of Great Britain. My best friend is Jewish and her family's tragic story as well as millions of other families' stories has made me believe that you can't grade people dividing them into classes and treating them as either the first or the second class and that you can't just use people as 'cannon fodder' in wars for your own criminal interests.

Unfortunately some British citizens longing for the past imperial ambitions (sic!) are itching for those gone ambitions now. They seem to believe that in our country homosexual people should be graded higher and treated better than heterosexual people. They can't understand why gay people in Russia are not favoured over straight people and why the latter's rights and freedom are not being limited or violated.

It's fascism, in my humble opinion. Great Britain has already made a costly mistake in the past by acknowledging and accepting Nazi Germany on the international level and by arranging the Olympics in Berlin in 1936. At first they allowed Hitler to get armed turning their blind eye to Jewish massacres and concentration camps for Jews and then they stopped isolation of the criminal Nazi regime by sending British sportsmen to the Olympics in Berlin.

Now we are all under similar threat. Unhappy with their rights which are equal to the rights of heterosexual people gays are campaigning their government and the IOC for staging the Olympiad not in Russia but somewhere else, in a country where their 'sort' of people are favoured over straight people.

'All that is needed for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing', so wrote Edmund Burke. Are you going to be those who allow evil to triumph?

Dear Mr. President! Dear Members of the IOC!

I'm begging you to ban countries that create hostility, evil and mutual hatred from taking part in the Olympics. I'm begging you to ban countries that grade people favouring and praising one 'sort' and humiliating the others. We all remember too well what this kind of 'grading' could lead to. We can't just keep quiet, we have to and must stress the equal rights of all the people regardless of their skin colour, ethnicity and sexual orientation. Who else if not us? When if not now?

In pursuit for peace and equal rights, with passion for sports,

Lena Miro.

I would also like to make something very clear - although I support Stephen Fry's ideas I have to say that in my opinion it's not just homosexual people who are under threat in modern Russian. It more or less concerns every minority or simply everybody who is different - in one way or another. 

Putin's supporters reaction to the open letter by Steven Fry

  Stephen Fry's famous letter concerning banning on the Russian Winter Olympics in 2014 because of severe violation of LGBT people's rights in Russia is one of the 'hottest' points for discussion in Russian blogs and media now. Here is the link http://www.stephenfry.com/2013/08/07/an-open-letter-to-david-cameron-and-the-ioc/

  While lots of Russians agree with the letter and share thoughts expressed in it, Putin's supporters are expressing the opposite view on the subject. 

  Like this, for instance, http://miss-tramell.livejournal.com/394926.html. An open letter to President Putin written by an infamous blogger Lena Miro, a member of the ruling party in Russia and the author of a few homophobic posts. Translation of the letter will be available in my blog in 10 minutes.

Lavender fields forever!

Amazing lavender fields not far from Broadway

  Lots of butterflies, bumble bees and other insects not paying any attention to tourists

  

  Some people are having a photo session

  Beautiful lavender fields, pleasing all your senses
   

  If you want to see them, hurry up - they started harvesting on the 1st of August and are about to finish by 15th. Lavender farms near Broadway, photos by Tim Colville ©, www.timcolville.co.uk

Look, what I have come across - a blog for Russians who try to learn English Language Etiquette

  Here is the link http://elerussians.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/whats-difference-between-english.html#comment-form


Oh, I hate the word 'etiquette' - its confusing spelling compliments the very tricky nature of the thing!

  Ian Mitchell writes for Russian-speaking people and seems to be sort of Professor Higgins with a touch of 'Scottishness' (yeah, it's a made-up word).

  Very interesting, sometimes slightly patronizing though when he tells Russians off for failing to get something right in English

Being polite...

...in the UK is quite a tricky thing for me.
Honestly, in Russia I was considered to be polite and tactful enough (sometimes too polite!) but here lots of things come across as rude.
  Being direct and straightforward - if it's only about your own thoughts and feelings! - is often seen as being rude and angry. And this is something that I so far have failed to understand.
  When shopping I tell a shop assistant that I don't want this dress because I don't like it, she gets such a face as if I have just made a nasty comment about her weird looking tattoo.
  When I don't smile back at a lame joke, a person who has made it, looks at me expectantly.
  When being asked something about Russia I give an answer that doesn't fit into my listener's ideas about what Russia is like, he or she looks at me as if I have just mentioned their mother in an unacceptable way.

  Not very long ago I read a post by the bloke who is the anchorman of the programme called Top Gear (yeah, it's an old one).
  He was sharing his unpleasant experience of travelling to Russia, where people - as he thinks - are all very rude, because they don't use all those apologetic phrases but go straight to the point. How rude! Russians apparently don't do famous small talk as well - barbaric country!
  So Mr. Jeremy Clarkson was happy to be back to the UK where he was finally able to do some small talking thing to a milkman!

  I am not even going to mention a simple fact of which Mr. Top Gear might not be aware of, which is - they don't speak English in Russia, sadly the state language in Russia is Russian and that nasty Russian girl at the hotel reception who told you, sir, "Passport!" instead of "I am really very sorry for bothering you, sir, but would you, sir, please be so kind and show me your passport, please? Sorry for causing that much trouble!" This barbaric Russian - and I am 100 percent certain of that - didn't mean to be rude in any way, her English might be very basic, but if you could speak or understand a little Russian you might probably be surprised to get all those apologetic phrases you needed that much.

  But that is just plain nonsense of course - everywhere they should speak English well enough to provide Mr. Top Gear with the sense of complete satisfaction. Language satisfaction.

  There is one thing I totally agree on with Mr. Not-liking-rude-Russians - Russian people don't do small talk.

  I am sorry but that's true. Life is short - go straight to the point!
 So when I go 'dress hunting' - that's the only type of hunting I am more or less good at! - instead of saying,
"That's a lovely gown, I like the embroidered skirt, and the fabric is so luxurious and the cut is divine, but I don't think I am good enough for this dress!" Instead of this I am - being a nasty rude Russian - likely to say, 'It's too loose and what's the point of having a nice waist and buying a bulky looking dress that makes you look as if you are trying to sneak a couple of foot balls into the party under your gown?"

  I am lying actually. I won't be saying that. I will say, 'It's ugly and I don't like it'.

However, you won't believe but on lots of occasions I was shocked at how rude British people are! At least they came across as being rude.

And here are some revealing examples:
1. I still can't get used to waiters in pubs and cafes who interrupt your conversations at table by asking, 'Was it OK? Was your food all right?' We are talking! Say 'Excuse me' at least! Instead they start shouting straightaway and grabbing the plates as if their buttocks are on fire. Very rude and unwelcoming.
2. British people starting talking to you in a weird voice when they find out you are a foreigner. I am Russian, not deaf! There is a difference :)
3. People emptying their noses loudly in public places like pubs and cafes. That's just gross, guys!
4. British people stare! No, it's like this - they S-T-A-R-E! Sometimes I feel as if some random person tries to X-ray me with his eyes.
5. British shop assistants at women's underwear department - I don't want any assistance with my bras, thank you very much! To be honest I just see it as invasion into my personal private space and having a look at my breasts.

These are just a few examples that came to mind :).
  

What Western (British, Americans, etc.) people know (or think they do) about Russia and Russians...

  It had never stricken me, it had never been that crystal clear until I moved to the UK how little (sadly!) or even less than little British people know about Russia and Russians.

 Now I am sort of 'surrounded' by Western culture, unlike lots of Russians abroad I don't watch Russian TV, don't read Russian newspapers and I tend to watch lots of Hollywood and British films instead. And it seems to me most Western cliches about Russia are still more like 'Cold War' type things, Russia and Russians still being 'monsters under your bed', something you get scared about without knowing a slightest thing.

  So, for you, dear readers, to get an idea of what it looks like to a Russian (pure 100% Russian :), here they are, British and Western cliches about Russia and Russians (based on films, programmes, articles on the Internet and in media).

1. Russians only eat cabbage soup. When they have had enough of cabbage soup, they start eating beetroot. Russians put beetroot into almost each and every dish, including puddings.

2. It's always bloody f***ing cold in Russia. Those who tell you it's actually +30 in Moscow in July are bloody sneaky KGB agents who just want to drag you into this freezing cold country where you are most likely to freeze you bloody bollocks off even in the middle of August!!! If you by some unluck have to travel to Russia in the summer you better pack your bloody uggs and a fur hat because it's bloody freezing.

3. All Russians are bandits, gangsters and mafia people. They are taught to be gangsters since kindergarten. A perfect gift for a Russian toddler is an AK gun. And a bag of beetroot, of course!

4. There are bears everywhere in Russia. Russians like deadly dangerous types of entertainment like getting drunk and dancing with bears in freezing cold. Bears in Russia actually prefer cabbage soup to honey, bite it, Winnie-the-Pooh!

5. Russians always shoot. They tend to start firing their AK guns as an argument in a discussion or every time they feel frustrated or upset. For example, when they don't have a bear to dance with or failed to find beet root in a banoffee pie!

6. Russians don't speak any English at all. Well, they don't have to - they all have an AK gun! If you come across a Russian who speaks almost perfect English, beware!!! It must be a sneaky f***king KGB agent.

7. When Russians speak English, they sound like meerkats. Like Alexander and Sergey from those infamous TV adverts. Only without being cute and cuddly like them.

  So, if we have a look at typical Western cliches about Russia and Russians, they are: cold, vodka, bears, mafia, AK guns, beetroot and cabbage soup!
  'Simples!!!'

Huge slugs in my garden!!!

  Unlike lots of women in Russia, I am not afraid of mice, snakes, I can even stand seeing a cockroach without fainting.

  In fact in my eventful life there were times when I used to catch mice with nearly bare hands - well, I had my hand wrapped in a plastic bag (or, rather, had a plastic bag over my hand) and was chasing after mice all over my room in the students' dorm. I caught about 20 or 30 of those squeaking monsters. Not every cat can boast of such heroism and that many trophies.
  All cockroaches in the neighbourhood knew I wasn't the one to mess with - I killed them with cold heart and slippers.
  But before moving to the UK I had never seen slugs of this size: they are huuuuuuuuuge! They are fat and disgusting.
  They live in my garden and happen to think they can treat themselves to my cat's food. They scare my cat and disgust me.
  If anyone knows a way to get rid of them for good, please let me know - they attack my cat's bowl which is outside at the moment because it's nice and warm. They come in the dark, quiet, disgusting intruders.
  Please let me know: my cat will be grateful :)

Something special about Britain

  Yes, I have been here for 8 or 9 months only and yes, I am currently experiencing some kind of inner cultural clashing, noticing lots of cultural differences between Russia and the UK.
  Some are nice, some scary and some really weird.
  Britain is the country where dogs of deadly breeds run in the parks freely like labrador puppies while little kids, mostly toddlers, are often kept on a leash.
 

(Copyright - http://www.youjustmademylist.com/?p=4560)

  When I saw my first 'leashed toddler' I couldn't but keep staring at both the kid and the proud parent.

  A couple of days ago in Worcester I spotted a young man with his baby daughter on a leash: he was busy fiddling with his iPhone while the girl wanted to look at some flowers and tried to reach them. The man didn't turn his head in her direction (too busy with facebook or something) but instead pulled the leash a few times like you do with your dog when it gets too excited over some pissed bush and you want to go home as quickly as possible because of some lame TV programme like 'Dogging with Stars' or 'Top Gear'. So you pull the leash in irritation, shouting, 'Come on, Spotty, time to go home!'

  Though I realise it must be because of parents being very protective of their kids, to me it looks weird and a bit barbaric

Exploring Russia: charming Suzdal

  If there is any tourists-friendly city in Russia it must be Suzdal.
  It is as charming, cosy and pastoral as it can be, it's a sort of  'Hollywood fairy-tale' picture of Russia.
  Located in 220 kms away from Moscow, Suzdal is a perfect place for spending a few days enjoying unique historical sights, medieval Russian architecture, long walks in nearly countryside surroundings, Russian cuisine and shopping for some funny memorable gifts.
 

(Copyright http://www.lifeisphoto.ru/photo.aspx?id=144535)

  It's so peaceful, friendly, generous, welcoming, so different from noisy Moscow with its hectic and crazy pace of life that you will feel relaxed, rested and, hopefully, will be able to really enjoy your stay in Russia :)

(Copyright - Dmitry Kuzin).

  It's a busy tourist place so there won't be any difficulties getting an English speaking guide.

  It's worth knowing that medieval architecture in Russia is mostly convents, monasteries and churches, however, Russian Orthodox churches, elegant and beautiful in their 'bridal white', with golden, green or blue cupolas give a very light, warming and joyful impression.

  And do not dare leaving Suzdal without trying their delicious dumplings and pancakes! :)

  Summer is traditionally a very festive season in Suzdal with lots of festivals, including the so called 'Cucumber Day', when a big 'cucumber parade' is held with fancy dresses and entertainment and Russian 'babushkas' selling home-made pickled cucumbers.

A couple of years ago I went to Suzdal for the 'Cucumber Day' and couldn't resist the temptation of buying a few home-made pickled cucumbers. They tasted heavenly but the most 'seductive' thing about them was this divine aroma, the combination of dill, parsley, young blackcurrant leaves, and all the herbs Russian 'babushkas' use, keeping their recipes in secret. And though it would sound weird but tasting these cucumbers might tell you more about Russia and Russians than books or articles in mass-media.

   

Eating Out in Moscow

Well, it's July now and we are in the peak of 'tourist' season in Moscow. 

If you want to visit the capital of Russia, the best time to do it is in the period from May to September.

Surprisingly enough September can be absolutely gorgeous: it's Indian summer so it is generally quite warm (+15/+19C) and nice and you can enjoy all those wonderful autumn colours without inevitable for this season  rains and winds.

  A couple of months ago I wrote this post http://morethaneverexpected.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/hostile-moscow.html about Moscow being unfriendly towards visitors. However, I will always keep saying that Russia is worth coming to because of its very different and unique culture. Moscow 'architectural treasures' are worth seeing - most of Western people I have known who came to Moscow either for holiday or on business have always pointed out how impressively different it is from anything they saw before.

  The infamous Moscow prices which are quite often ridiculously high can be a total deal-breaker if you want  to visit Moscow. It is the city where they can charge you 10 pounds for a cup of coffee in a coffee-shop and your coffee will still be a disappointment. 

  So I am going to be 'painfully honest' with you: visiting Moscow for high-class dining out experience might not be a very good idea. If posh dining out isn't something you are looking for, if you are travelling to Moscow to see the Kremlin, St. Basil's Cathedral, famous Moscow churches, beautiful 'palace parks' like Ostankino or Tsaritsino and you only need good though probably not very sophisticated food to keep you happy I suggest you stick to fast food restaurants.

So here they are:

1. Macdonald's, KFC and some other familiar brands: noisy, usually crowded, but safe and very predictable.  So far, living in the UK and visiting Macdonald's (I like their toffee sundae) I haven't spotted any principal differences between the menu here, in the UK, and in Moscow. 

Though you shouldn't expect the staff to speak English there will always be a manager who will help you out and even if he or she fails to understand your, for instance, Black Country accent, which is absolutely fantastic but I have to admit it sounds extremely frustrating to a Russian ear, - even in this case you will always be able to simply point to food you want on a picture.

  Moscow prices in Macdonald's are more or less the same as in the UK, might be slightly higher though.

2. 'Elki-palki' or, in Russian, "Елки-палки". It's a chain of fast food restaurants where you in fact get proper service - with waiters and so on. It is Russian national cuisine or, to be precise, stylized Russian cuisine.

  It's all about Russian pancakes and dumplings and traditional meat or fish dishes.

  Here is the link to their website http://www.elki-palki.ru/moskva/

  Unfortunately the menu is in Russian only, but as I have been in their restaurants with my English speaking friends quite a few times I can say (basing on experience) that the staff there can speak basic English quite often.

  If you are curious about their menu now please ask - I can translate bits of it for you, dear readers:)

  In fact if there is any Moscow equivalent to British family pubs - 'Elki-palki' must be it.

  Dinner for 2 people (without alcohol) will cost you around 25-30 pounds, there are a lot of restaurants all over Moscow, the menu is always more or less the same and though I can not say that it's posh or fine dining but it's as tasty, nice and welcoming as it can be.

  

In this photo you can see the so called 'telega' (a cart in Russian) which is basically a buffet with a variety of salads, dips, lots of which are vegetarian and trust me - not all of them contain cabbage or beet-root, something you would expect from Russians! Quite tasty and filling :)

3. 'Mou-mou' fast food restaurants ("Му-му" in Russian), means 'moo', yeah, you got it right - it's what a cow says. Why a cow and 'moo'? Do not get over-excited and think that it means a good piece of steak. No :)

  The chain actually got its name from  famous Soviet sweets called 'Moo-moo', which are basically caramel toffees and you will be given a sweet for free every time you buy something from 'Mou-mou'.

  Like 'Elki-palki' it's a chain of restaurants so you can find a 'Mou-mou' place almost everywhere. Unlike 'Elki-Palki' though you don't get waiters' service there - it's like a canteen.

 Which means you come there, grab a tray and move along the line with food where you are asked what you would like. It starts with all types of salads, then soups, then hot dishes, then desserts and drinks.

  Here is the link to their menu http://www.cafemumu.ru/menu/

  Sadly - again in Russian only. Explaining to a person behind the counter what you would like without knowing Russian is a tricky bit of course but all the foods are displayed so you can simply have a look and point to something you like. Or bring your Russian speaking friend with you :) Or ask me to translate something from the menu for you :)

  Here is what their places look like:

  

Quite nice, actually. The biggest advantage is the price, your full dinner (not including alcohol) will cost you 15 pounds or so for two.

4. 'Taras Bulba'. Again a chain of restaurants. It's Ukrainian cuisine, not Russian basically, but it is rather similar. It's named after a famous Ukrainian war hero Taras Bulba (you can google a book about him, written by a great Russian 19th century writer Nicolay Gogol').

  Though the interior might seem OTT or even tacky the food is nice and filling and you will definitely enjoy the experience.

  

It's a more expensive option than 'Elki-palki' but they do have - if I remember that right - English menus in their restaurants.

  So these have been my recommendations for dining out places in Moscow. Hopefully you will find them helpful if you are planning on travelling to the capital of Russia.

  And if there are questions you want to ask, then go ahead :)

Hostile Moscow

My husband shared the review (this British person obviously went to Moscow for the weekend and was quite disappointed with the city).
Here is the review:

Just sitting at Moscow airport waiting for the plane home. 

Lets just say Moscow isn't really set up for or interested in tourists. The main things we came to see (Kremlin and St Basil's cathedral) have been closed all weekend despite contrary info on their websites. Everywhere is really expensive (£17 for two coffees earlier) and trying to rip you off. It's dusty everywhere and the tube is very hard to navigate if you don't speak Russian.

As for the people - I have never come across a country where everybody is so bloody miserable all the time.

Oh, and it appears smoking is compulsory once you reach about age 12 (including in shops/hotels/restaurants).

And I missed the Wolves game to come here.

 Though of course sneaky Russians are not to blame for the fact that this devoted Seagulls supporter missed the game I can't but agree with most what he wrote. 

Sadly Moscow isn't very friendly to tourists - that's true. Tourism isn't (and has never been) the main sphere of concern for the city authorities. Nearly nothing is done to make the city attractive  to tourists. Which is incredibly sad because Moscow is absolutely unique: Russian architecture, churches, historic building are amazingly different from what you can see in any other city in Europe. 

But Moscow is indifferent to what impression the city and its ways make on foreign guests.

More than 10 years ago when I then a student worked part-time as a tour guide in Moscow (mostly with American guests) I was deeply upset about how little was done to make the city welcoming to foreigners. But I was hoping it would change in a 5-10 years time. Apparently I was naive. It is still scary, unfriendly and confusing.

What can a foreign visitor do to make their stay in Moscow nice and pleasant? 

What should you do if - in spite of all the notoriety of the city and ill reputation of "sneaky f**king Russians" - you still want to see something amazingly unique, feel this spirit of classical historic buildings and the divine atmosphere of Russian Orthodox churches? 

Here are some tips:

1. Make some Russian friends before going to Moscow. They can be your pen-palls, some people you meet on the Internet or ask your friends if they know any Russians living in Moscow. It's always helpful when being in Moscow you will have some phone numbers of Russians whom you can call and ask for help, for directions, for tips or even translation.

You will be surprised to see that "unfriendly Russians" (it's how we appear to look in the streets) when you know them are eager to help, to guide and offer support.

2. Make a kind of plan of what you want to see before going. Moscow unlike Prague or Berlin can't boast of lots of opportunities for enjoying each and every place. You can just wander around but you are unlikely to enjoy it. Make a list: Kremlin, Red Square, The Tsaritsyno Park, The Tretyakov Gallery - whatever, it will give you a clear idea of where you can go.

3. Get acknowledged with Moscow Metro (Underground) and find out what stations you will need. All the stops in the underground are announced in Russian only - so better make a route for yourself and write the names of the stations you need in Russian (just copy the letters) so that you can simply show this to people and ask for guidance if needed. 

4. Get a guide book with some phrases in Russian: you might not be able to pronounce them correctly but again - you can always show your guide-book to passersby in the streets or to policemen.

If I think of any other tips I will write about them here later:)

About Russian Cossacks

For most Western people the term Russian Cossacks is actually a synonym for every Russian, usually brutal, rude and with no understanding of norms of social behaviour.

In fact Wikipedia tells us that Cossacks
Are a group of predominantly East Slavic people who originally were members of democratic, semi-military^[1] communities in Ukraine and Southern Russia (here is the link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cossacks )
They were both farmers and warriors, knowing how to use a plough and a sable, serving Russian Empire trying to keep their relative political independence.
Big part of Cossacks' cultural and historical legacy are songs or romance songs, still very popular all over Russia, Ukraine and in some other places in the world.
Here is Peter Nalich (famous for his Gitar Gitar song) singing Ne dlya menya (Not for me) with his band
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BBKSyeAiM8

P.S. My cat likes the song:).

Full Russian breakfast

Full English breakfast looks like a serious kick on a stomach, there is no way I could digest this amount of hearty food in the morning on a regular basis. But what's for sure - the nation that can have black pudding for breakfast every day can not be defeated!
  So is there such a thing as full Russian breakfast? Well, there definitely isn't. If you travel in Russia and stay at hotels you are most likely to be offered continental breakfast which will include bread of different types, selection of cheeses, cold meat and Russian sausages, and if you are keen on a bit of "Russian touch" this is likely to be kashas.
  Kasha is usually made with boiled milk and butter and might include fruit and honey. Porridge (oats kasha) is quite popular in Russia but it's not the only option.
  Other popular kashas include buckwheat, semolina and millet.
  Here is some millet kasha in a pot - in olden days Russians used to cook kashas for hours in ovens, so that the grain got soft and kasha got all the nice flavours and, as we Russians say, melted in your mouth.

Semolina kashas might include home made jams, while buckwheat kasha is often cooked with stewed onions and mushrooms.
  Hot, tender, filling and "comfy" kasha is a healthy and nice way to start your day:) 

Is there something Russian about you?

Russians - as Western media often portraits them - are sneaky dangerous aggressive people.
You might think that the fact you have been born far away from the country where people heal their hangover headaches with weird liquid called rassol (which is basically salty boiled water in which pickled cucumbers tend to float in a jar) - you might think that this fact kind of guarantees that you are safe from having something Russian about you but you are wrong.
So here is a little quiz which can help you find out whether there's something Russian about you.

You might be Russian if:
1. You adore fast driving. The more drunk you are the faster you are going to drive.
2. Being a man you would rather spend a nice Friday evening cuddling a 1,5 litre bottle of vodka than going on a date.
3. You keep saying your country is sucks but are always ready to smash some foreigner's nose if you think they are not respectful enough.
4. You like lying on your sofa imagining something miraculous will happen and you become rich, beautiful and happy.
5. You can talk for an hour using no other words apart from swear ones and some prepositions.

Gracious swans

That's me feeding swans in Stratford last June.

As all swans in the UK belong to the Queen you can't just catch one and make some decent swan casserole,  but swans used to be a great part of the Russian national cuizine. They were cooked and served mostly as impressive table decorations during grand dinner parties, some of them were so huge that they required several people to carry these "birdies" into dining halls from dirty and smelly medieval Russian kitchens. They used to be served on regular basis in rich homes.
  Ignorance is bliss - those Stradford swans are pretty unaware I could grab them and cook something very Russian - huge, impressive and tasting very.... featherly!

Some funny and weird Russian superstitions

Every time I see a black cat trying to cross a path I am walking on I either scare it off the path or go another way. Because it's one of the most common Russian superstitions - if a black cat crosses the path you are walking on just in front of you this can mean bad luck.
So here are some other ones (most of them are weird, some are really creepy):
1. Do not whistle inside a house or a flat - if you whistle you will have no money. You can whistle as much as you like when you are outside though - if other people don't mind!
2. Bumping into a woman with empty buckets in the street means getting some bad luck - fortunately you can't see lots of women with buckets empty or not in the streets these days. However if a woman has got two buckets filled with water - well, this means good luck and prosperity!
3. Russians spit a lot. Across their left shoulders. Weird it might seem to ignorant Western people but we scare away some bad luck with that!
4. We also knock a lot on wood to keep bad luck away - long story short spitting and knocking might be great fun when done for a reason! Even some freaky one....
to be continued....
If you know some funny superstitions please tell me:)

100 Facts About Me... Well, Almost 100!

Rats have got very bad reputation in Russia. In Moscow they are everywhere: in the underground, in litter bins, in cellars of block of flats. Huge, nasty, sneaky and very aggressive.
I used to be scared of rats. To overcome the phobia I got myself two pet rats - they lived happily together in a sort of enemy-friend relationship for almost 3 years. They were pet rats of course, I didn't catch a couple of wild ones in the street - that's for sure!
There are amazing animals and humanity owes them a great deal (keep in mind all those new medicine tests!)
The photo was taken from here http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/gallery/2013/mar/05/mammal-society-photographer-in-pictures#/?picture=404888011&index=14

British men: myths, reality?

There's a community in Russian LiveJournal called Pora valit' what actually means "It's time to move away from Russia". Russian speaking people those who emigrated from the country (or other former Soviet republics such as Ukraine or Kazakhstan) share their experience, those Russians who are planning to move to other countries ask for some tips and advice.
  One of popular bloggers, a Russian speaking young woman who has lived in the UK for more than 7 years shared her ideas of what British men are really like here  http://pora-valit.livejournal.com/1074005.html  
  I have done some translation and sharing it with you here

About English men

In the times on Soviet Union there was this belief that every foreigner is nearly a prince charming. This delusion could be justified by some objective grounds, including The Iron Curtain and the like ones. But I have noticed that this myth about foreign men being exclusive is still quite common and that marrying a foreign man is still seen as being very prestigious.....

English men cheat on their wives or girlfriends less often than Russians. But it's not because of high moral standards, it's just all about the principle of so called "fair play". It's bad to steal something that doesn't belong to you. Plus English men are inert and passive, they seldom reflect on feelings and love matters, they loathe changing their usual way of life, and having an affair is simply very pricey when it comes to spending time, finance and energy. It's also very pricey to leave your wife and get a divorce.

English men are not very fussy about their female partners' appearances. It's quite common here in the UK to see a very handsome good-looking man with an unattractive woman. Sometimes their women are really ugly. It's not because all English women are very ugly and English men simply have no choice. It's due to the fact that this cult of appearance of being attractive isn't very much developed in the UK. What is more important - English men tend to choose the easiest option, being inert and passive, they think that ugly women are an easy target and much easier to "lay" and to please....

English men drink, drink really a lot, but they seldom have days of drinking...

Both English men and women are very shy and reserved, the worst nightmare for an English person is finding themselves in a embarrassing situation. All the communication codes here are arranged the way to avoid embarrassing situations and even to prevent such situations from happening...4

When an English man falls in love though keeping in mind their cold temperament it's hardly possible to use this phrase so let's say - when an English man starts feeling attracted to a woman he usually finds himself in a pickle. Getting out of this pickle is possible in two ways:

1. Irony and sarcasm. Joking and taking the mickey out of a woman. It's like when you are in a primary school - if you fancy a girl you simply beat her up with your school bag. The same happens with English men "in love". They express their interest towards a woman by laughing at her and taking the mickey out of her...

2. Bare rudeness and offence. It's a paradox but that's true that it's much easier for an English man to get very drunk and tell a woman he fancies somewhat like "Fancy a shag?" rather than ask her out for a real date. A date is too straightforward and direct, it speaks clearly and openly of your feelings and intentions. While suggesting shagging isn't that embarrassing and means somewhat like "I was just passing by and I had an urge and you can just work nicely as a sperm-accepter!"

If an English man is brave enough to ask for a date you should not expect anything exciting. They are not an impulsive people and hide their feelings, sticking to a boring and trivial scenario. If he invites you to go out to the cinema that's pretty interesting. If he suggests going to the theatre - it's something extraordinary! Has he bought you flowers? What a real charmer! A usual date means going for a drink in a pub or for a coffee, for a dinner at a restaurant what is very rare. And then you have to split the bill. English men seldom pay for a woman. If he pays for the dinner he expects to have sex this very night.

It's not a custom to take a woman home after a date. If a man does take a woman home he expects sex.

English men are so lazy, passive and inert that it looks really ridiculous. If you have exchanged phone numbers with an English man he often starts arranging the first date and then he says something like "Look, I am knackered, you'd better come to my place and we cook dinner together" which basically means "I don't want to go out anywhere I'd rather you come to my place and we have quick sex in an old "bam-wham-thank you ma'm" style.

Let's get it started!:)

Let's get it started!:)